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Death of Star Wars 2

This second page has been created because the first page grew so huge that Tripod would not compile it. Hopefully it won't get as far as a third page but at this early stage it's very hard to tell. If you liked the first page, then I know you'll like this one...

The predictable and obligatory Death of the Phantom Menace page, complete with pants from the film, terrible songs and everything!
Click here to experience it!

Pants of the Clones! Not to be Missed! Watch this space for the link.

Computer Wars
Well, it all started with the phrase "Do not underestimate the power of the Playstation"....
Pants Wars
Star Wars with key words replaced with the word 'pants': what fun!
Look sir, Droids!
The sheer delight of the scene where Imperial Stormtroopers prove their worth by not going for the obvious clues.

Computer Wars

"Do not underestimate the power of the Playstation."

"Curse my metal joystick, I wasn't fast enough."

"Put Captain Solo in the Rumblepak."

"He's on my joypad! I can't shake him!"

"You came in that zip drive? You're braver than I thought!"

"I've got a Rumblepak back here!"
"Pull it out!"
"I can handle it!" (CRASH)

"Yoshi never told you what happened to your Memcard."
"He told me enough! He told me he ate it!"
"No. I have your Memcard."

"A Sega. You have a Sega."

"Obi-Wan was wise to hide it from me. Now I will play all day long."

"Strike me down with all your combination moves and your journey towards a high score will be complete."

"Oh, I'm afraid the console will be quite operational when your friends arrive."

"That's no PC...That's a console!"
"It's too big to be a console!"

"I've got a bad interface about this."

"Your pixels... you will not need them."

"Your mouse buttons... you will not need them."

"Sega... Nintendo... Spectrum... the Dark Side of the Computer are they."

"Use the keyboard, Luke."

"Now, young Skywalker... READY!.... FIGHT!"

"When 900 points you reach, look as good you will not."

"Wars do not make one great, only high scores."

"I seek a great cartridge."
"Tomb Raider. Mmm? You seek Tomb Raider."

"Somebody get this walking Playstation out of my way."

"But if I don't go now, I'll never complete it."

"Your overconfidence is your weakness."
"Your faith in your savegame is yours!"

"The power to destroy a planet is insignificant compared to p."

"Yoshis always walk in single file to hide their numbers."

"And I thought Speccies looked bad on the outside."

"You will have to learn the control style if you want to go to level 2."

"Utalura, Solo."                           (Your turn, Solo)

"Ho ho ho ho ho...."
"I'd recognise that end-of-level bad guy anywhere."

"What happened to the level codes they sent you?"

"If this is the games console then where are the games?"

"This is your last chance Jabba! You've only got one life left!"

"You are a hacker and a player and part of a rebel network. Take her away!"

"A koopa! Where?"

"I thought you said you couldn't see?"
"I closed the curtains and now the glare has gone."

"Chewie! Get me a joypad Chewie!"

"You may switch to Super VGA when ready Commander."

"You are the player now... Admiral."

"I thought I sensed your foul colourscheme when I logged on!"

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Pants Wars

The way this one works is by replacing key words in SW quotes with the word 'pants' (it's funnier if you're British, methinks).

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Look sir, Droids!

This is a tribute to that famous scene in A New Hope when a stormtrooper comes on from the bottom of the screen with a washer in his hand and says "Look Sir, Droids". Now this, you may say, is not exactly the best scene to pay tribute to, but if you think about it, why did the washer give away the presence of droids? Surely the tracks, leading off into the desert, would have given away the presence of droids? And so, here it is, a tribute to that stormtrooper and his incredible detective skills.

"Look sir, Sand!"

Stormtrooper on the intercom to HQ: "Yes sir, from the tracks we think it was Mr. Sinclair pushing his C5 again..."
"Look sir, a washer"
"Yes, it's definitely the C5 sir, we've found a washer."

"Sir these tracks are concurrent with those made by a man pushing a shopping trolley... but this washer... I don't understand."

R2D2 and C3P0 in the desert, suddenly there is a twang from inside C3P0: "Oh R2, it looks like I've lost that washer again."

"Look sir, Dewbacks!"

"Look sir, a shoe!"
"That's your shoe, you idiot!"
"Oh. Sorry sir."

Stormtrooper examines the tracks: "Definitely the tracks of a miniature Sandcrawler."

"Look sir, a washer from the life pod!"

"Sir, by the quantity of sand I would like to put forward the hypothesis that we are in a desert."

"Sir, these tracks appear to be those of several men and a lot of luggage..." (Space Balls)

"Look sir, droids. And from this washer it appears to be an... R2 unit and a protocol droid. And sir, it looks as though they are carrying the plans straight to the sandpeople!"
"How do you know all this?"
"Well, sir, they're just over there." (points at droids, too slow to escape)

"Look Sir, Robin Reliant!"

According to Blade, the scene had to have been filmed with the clever stormtrooper naked from the waist down (due to the difficulty of bending while in a stormtrooper outfit) which leads to even more strange possibilities...

Stormtrooper on intercom to HQ: "Yes sir, we definitely have a problem. We can't pick up the washer."

Stormtrooper on intercom to HQ: "Yes sir, the tracks seem to be droid tracks. They were hea-AAAAAAaaaargh! McCready! Put some trousers on!"

"Look sir, sunburn."

And so on and so forth. More ideas will be posted soon and any suggestions are, as usual, gratefully recieved (see above).

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Click here for the Death of the Phantom Menace!

Any sugestions for this page are gratefully received; either send them to me at dracoliche@hotmail.com or any other address you know me at, and I'll post them up.

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